My life has been a mix of the good, bad, wonderful and absolutely heartbreaking..
The highs have been amazing, glorious, and spectacular..
The lows have been some of the worst days of my life..
Then there is the everyday - all that lies in between the two extremes,
Some of my highs - Birth of our children rates right up there.. Our weddings - more so the second one, it was more 'us'. Our family gatherings, holidays vacations, birth of our granddaughter, watching our children blossom and grow...
Lows - Death of my sister, then both my parents (sister health issues, mom cancer, dad suicide) - all in 2005.. Our financial struggles in the past, our Divorce, Miscarriages, an abortion, The time a nasty neighbor called CPS on us.. (bogus but still was awful) Then there was the stretch when Daryl was laid off 7 times during 10 years.. And all the mistakes I made as a daughter, sister, wife and mom, and there were a lot.
The in betweens have things that are good, and things that are bad..
Good things can be as simple as clipping coupons and saving my family money that way... or as awesome as a college acceptance letter to my child, to our son moving back to the area after being gone several hours away for a while... Just everyday happy moments..
Bad things are also just normal everyday stuff - kids arguing, with each other and me.. Hearing my children tell me they hate me, My chronic illness, Worrying about my children feeling unloved, low self esteem, breaking up with boyfriends/girlfriends.. Worries about work, money, just stuff that we have to live with....
All of this makes me who I am.. It makes me the person my husband loves, and my kids alternately love and hate.. (I hope that once I no longer have teens, I will not be hated anymore) Makes me the person my company hired, the person my friends like, and my cat adores (and if you know me, that is important ) .
I like myself,
I like myself,
I forgive myself for the things I did wrong
And I am pretty darn happy with my life now.
I hope everyone loves themselves.. and forgives themselves.
We are all imperfectly perfect people.
God loves us no matter what